Resolution.. kinda

When I say resolution.. I only mean my own.

I've made my final decision. Baby S was given to me for a reason. There is no way I can dispose of her.

I've made my peace with the fact that the future is uncertain.

It's not something I enjoy feeling; that I don't have a plan and I don't have a clue what is going to happen. Hopefully some miracles come through for us and I can pay the rent, utilities, cell phone and car insurance this coming month.

I've been hit very hard with the possibility that Baby S may not make it to term. This is something I do not currently know for sure, and I probably won't find out for at least another month. But I do know that if she isn't to make it; it won't be because I wasn't strong enough to fight for her. I will not have her blood on my hands; my own blood as it is right now.

So- here goes nothing! Calling the lawyer tomorrow, Birthright on Tuesday.