Friday, July 20, 2012

Baby S .. birth story part 2

So to pick up where we left off:
Friday- Cervadil induction scheduled. 11pm insertion, scheduled for 11am removal and start of Pitocin if necessary at 12pm.
Saturday- induction cancelled. Sent home

As stated in the previous post, I was determined to go into the hospital in labor on Sunday. So we spent Sunday doing all the things that are suggested to put a woman into labor. Lots of sex, nipple stimulation with my pump, walking, and I even ate some spicy salsa (eww btw). As a last resort I tried an enema, which did absolutely nothing but produce ONE really long good contraction.

I was done.
We went in to the hospital at 8:30, as instructed. Immediately upon getting into the hospital waiting room my contractions (which had subsided the entire time we were at home) picked up to their previous rate of 5-7 minutes apart. We were told that because of the cardiac situation and staffing concerns they would not be starting my induction process until midnight. I was contracting anyways, and there was nothing we could do about it, so we settled in and took our time setting up the room and getting ready for the night. We had the same ditzy nurse, but she was a little bit more prepared for us this time and had the tub room ready and knew not to ask me to change into the stupid hospital gown.

And at midnight, true to their word, they started the pitocin! I wasn't chancing it with the cervadil again, I was going straight for the good stuff. I spent the first couple of hours in bed, watching a movie with Jeremy while hooked up to the monitors. I had brought my body markers and wrote the cue words of 'peace' 'release' 'love' and 'let go' on my arms and hands. When I felt like things were picking up a bit I asked for the nurse to go find the telemetry monitors so that I could get up and move around. I got a ball also and sat on that for a while while she looked for the wireless pieces for the monitors, and totally lost myself in the zone of labor.

When I finally got hooked up to the telemetry it was time to move the birth ball away from the side of the bed. I was irritated with being so enclosed and wanted to be in the middle of the floor. I rocked during my contractions, and rested squatting on the floor in between. I remember that they were about 3 minutes apart and Jeremy told me they were peaking at about 120 on the monitors. My pitocin was on 4. I had no idea how long it was going to take, but I figured it would be better to call my doula and photographer then and have them there then to have things start moving really quickly and have them miss it. I'm glad I called when I did. I believe it was about 2:30am when I called Amber and Kristen. Amber got there in about 20 minutes, Kristen took a bit longer. At that point the pitocin was on 6 and I was ready to try the tub. At that point I was breathing through fairly intense contractions, reminding myself of my cue word 'release' (which was written on my right arm and thank goodness because it was a great reminder)

The tub was amazing! I immediately felt like the contractions were less intense. A feeling of relaxation washed over me and while it took a few contractions to get into a good position, I felt comfortable there. My doula was wonderful reminding me to drink water, and Jeremy got me a Sprite because I needed to burp a lot. I had a lot of gas as well, and in between contractions we laughed at my gas bubbles and other little things. I kept expecting the contractions to pick up in intensity, but they never did. I completely lost track of time in the tub, which was heavenly.

During one fairly long contraction, I felt the telltale 'pop and gush' of my water breaking. From there labor became very intense and I was consumed with staying on top of the contractions. They came fast and furious from that point on, sometimes two or three at a time, with little break between. I don't remember exactly when, but I know that shortly after my water broke Baby S adjusted herself into position. She did this in the middle of contractions that were coming on strong, and I do remember looking at my doula and asking 'what the heck is she doing in there?' and talking to my belly 'stop it.. that's not comfortable!' My nurse came in and asked if I felt 'pushy' which I didn't. She turned the pitocin down (thank goodness) and it stayed at a 4 until I delivered (or at least I think so hahaha I wasn't really paying attention at that point). After a short time in the tub with the more intense contractions I really felt like I had to use the toilet. My doula and Jeremy helped me out of the tub, and I realized just how hot I had been in there. The cool breeze felt good. I sat on the toilet and pooped, which felt great. I had a few contractions on the toilet also and decided I didn't know what people were talking about when they said it felt good to sit on the toilet during labor. I did not enjoy it at all!

After my potty break, Kristen asked me if I wanted to get back in the tub, or do something else. I was in a state of dazed.. not sure what I wanted. Part of me wanted to get back in the tub, but I'd been so hot I felt like I needed the fresh air of being in the room. I wanted so bad to go lay down for a few minutes and recoup, so that's what I decided I wanted to do. After about 5 contractions on the bed, one laying down and 4 trying to find a good position sitting and leaning against the back, I decided the bed wasn't working and moved back to the birth ball on the floor. My telemetry wasn't functioning properly anymore, so the charge nurse came in and helped me get back onto the wired monitors. This meant that I had to be right next to the bed again, which made me a bit anxious because there was very little room and people kept walking around me. I soon forgot about that though, and was back into my own little world.

One of my biggest issues during this part of my labor was that I didn't feel like I could completely relax and release my hips. I was trying hard to release, as I knew this would help the baby descend, but every time I released my hips I would sink to the ground which was not working for me. I ended up having Jeremy pushing against my butt/hips as I was on my hands and knees so that when I would have a contraction he could support my weight and I could get the deep release I needed in my hips. That was so much better, and I think it helped things to progress as fast as they did. I did threaten to fart on him, but I didn't find his reaction very funny. He definitely got yelled at and told not to move like that again.

My nurse had come in and asked several times if I felt pushy yet. I had no inclination to push, so I always told her no. She would disappear, and we would do our own thing again. I honestly had no idea that Baby S was so close to being born. My doula, however, had a better idea. She suggested we move to the bed, and I agreed, but after the contraction that was just starting. Moving, however, never happened. At the end of that contraction my body involuntarily pushed, and the head was halfway born. I remember reaching down to feel her, and knowing that her head was mostly out. Kristen went for the call button and everyone else went into 'oh shit' mode. The nurse on the other end was all calm 'I'll page your nurse', and Kristen had to buzz her a second time and tell her 'the baby's coming NOW!' while I was yelling on the floor that I didn't want to do it anymore and I wanted some Stadol.

This is where I go fuzzy. I was very consumed in delivery, yelling that I couldn't do it, give me some f**ing meds, etc. Baby S was halfway out, and I was doing everything possible not to push any more because I was so afraid I was going to tear. From what I"m told the door to my room is cracked open, maybe 6 inches, and people are just pouring into the room, bewildered that the baby is almost here and they are not ready. The doctor who caught her had her glove halfway on, no fingers, just pretty much draped it over her hand and hoped for the best. I'm sure it was a funny sight to see; if only I'd been on the other end. 2, maybe 3 pushes later this beautiful baby girl was ejected from my body and flung into the world, screaming her head off. I collapsed in tears; I couldn't stop repeating, she's crying! I had hoped she would, but never really expected that my wish would come true. I was practically picked up off the floor and placed on the bed for delivery of the placenta while she was looked over and evaluated on the other side of the room. Delayed cord clamping didn't happen :(

Delivering the placenta didn't take very long. I was impatient, so I gave a push every few minutes, and in about 10 minutes I had a good long contraction that pushed it out. I insisted that they bring her over to me before rushing her away, and I spent about 5 minutes staring at her and crying over her before she went off to the NICU. I really don't remember when the doctors and nurses who were taking care of me left, but within an hour my mother came back and told me they were bringing Baby S up to the PCTU (Pediatric Cardio-Thoracic Unit) and if I wanted to see her before she went I had to go now. We went and spent about a half hour looking at her, soothing her, stroking her before they came to take her up and I went back to my empty, baby-less room.

And that was it.
Baby S was born on June 25th, her due date, at 6:51am. She weighed 6lb, 9oz, 19 inches long. Almost a month later, she is still hospitalized. More on that to come:

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